This article was originally written on 18th December, 2010 and published on one of my previous blogs which is going to be deleted. Through this article, I want to introduce to everyone, a close friend of mine. You can call her ‘S’.
The article below was previously read only by ‘S’ because it was published as a password protected post. I am publishing this here so that you too can get to know her and when you read my next blogpost, hopefully you won’t say “What the hell is he talking about? Rubbish!”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~


^_^

This world is a weird place.

This Life is wonderful, no matter what.

18 years gone by, and my Life has already given me a taste of so many emotions, feelings, and experiences. 

Sometimes I feel like a septuagenarian – remembering the old days, and smiling to myself. And sometimes I feel like a little child – eager for more.

Sometimes I wonder – Have I lived my life how I should have? Do I have any regrets?

What if I was given a choice to live my life all over again? Would I take it? If you’d ask me that question someday, I’d probably answer something like – Ya! Maybe! or Dunno!

But also at that moment, I would know, and say to myself silently – No. Even if a better life was laid before me in a platter, waiting to be accepted, I would never ever ever EVER live my life all over again.

But that is completely idiotic. An opportunity for a better life? Even Ratan Tata would take it.

But no! I wouldn’t.

Why?

Because my life is already so full of special people and special experiences that I will never give up this life for anything else. If I live my life all over again, there is no guarantee that I might experience the same things and meet the same people in the same way as I have. And I can’t give that up.

Here are some of these specials if you are curious >> My Parents, My Home, My Ancestors, My Late Grandfather, Don Bosco Liluah, Pixie(my dog), My best friend, and ‘S’.

For sometime let’s imagine that you’re interested. So let me tell you about ‘S’.

There aren’t enough words in any dictionary to describe S. There will never be enough words in any language to describe S and what she means to me. But wait! I’ll still use some.

S is – beautiful, wonderful, stunning, awesome, cute, talented, friendly, mysterious, intriguing, eccentric, calm, exuberant, euphoric, adorable, angelic, sweet, lovely, admirable, bewitching, enchanting, charming, delicate, elegant, fascinating, breathtaking, breath-stopping, brain-stopping, heart-blocking, and so much more.

If you’re a teenager, you’d probably think that I’m talking about my girlfriend. If you’re an adult you’d probably think that I’m talking about my wife. If you’re a kid, you’ve probably never heard so many adjectives together.

I’d doubt it if anyone, other than me, will ever understand exactly what I’m talking about. Because it is so mysterious and enchanting, the way I met her. Because it is so wonderful and lovely, how she became my good friend. And every moment I’ve spent with her chatting, texting, or talking, has been so memorable. In so many uncountable ways, she is so very ’special’ to me.

Let me tell you how I met her.

That anime profile picture with her name in one of my friend’s scraps – a friend request sent after collecting a lot of courage – that day after tuition classes when my friend notifies me that ’she’ had upload a few pictures of herself – I go home – and yeah! She is good looking – Anyway, I remember her face.

Then comes Boscotsav, our school fest – back stage duty – so difficult to do my duty in a congested backstage full of girls – a black acoustic guitar kept on the table beside me – 3 or 5 girls on the other side of the table talking amongst themselves – next performance – some problem with the synthesizer – I shove my way forward eager to render my expert assistance with synthesizers – (And my fingers have already become cold so it is difficult to even type this) – it is empty on the other side of the stage – and what is that boy doing there? He shouldn’t be loitering around here – and wait! Is that???…

… [Blank]…

I was then a flickering tube-light with broken thoughts and half-actions.

Me: Is that? Or is it someone else?

Him: Stop it you characterless! Chup Chap move to the other side.

Me: Well but I’ve seen her in the pictures but I didn’t know that she was…

Him: Stop gaping at her like a monkey you idiot!

Me: But what if it IS her?

Him: And what if it ISN’T?

Me: But I can’t take my eyes off her.

Him: DON’T look at her like that. She’ll think that you are characterless!

Me: uh? Oh! Ohkay But! Wait! She just smiled… and Oh No! She just said ‘Hi’ so sweetly! What am I going to 
do? What should I do? What will I do? Aaaaah! *Internal Panic Attack*

Him: hmm… let me think.

Me: Well you should think fast because time is running out! Come ON! What should I do? The first time some girl tells me ‘hi’ so sweetly and then what am I supposed to do?

Him: hmm… umm… I get it… Well in that case it seems like after a lot of introspection and analysis, I have classified my results into 3 categories which broadly seem to suggest in a weird and sluggish kind of a manner that…

Me: FAST!

Him: Okay Okay! Chill! Yeah she is ‘S’.

Me: So what should I DO?

Him: What? Oh! Smile back you idiot! Say ‘Hi’ Say ‘Hi’!

Me: Oh my god! I Can’t!

Him: DO it you dramatic megalomaniac! At least look at her and say ‘Hi’… Do SOMETHING!!!

… and the result? Can’t be described! Even I don’t know  what I did myself. She does…

And I can’t describe what I have done in the three years after that. But I can sure describe what had happened to me actually after I had met her.

Well I had the first big real crush of my life. And the problem is that crushes die out eventually. But this crush seems to have an incessant desire to stay. Two and a half years(approx.) have passed since that unforgettable day of my life and I still have bouts of the same rush-of-feelings whenever I even think about her. Why is it so? I have no idea. It’s just complicated! 

And I don’t know if we will stay in touch forever, but I will definitely try my bestest-best to stay friends forever despite WHATEVER circumstances arise or HOWEVER angry she becomes with me. I have always hated myself when I have hurt her or disappointed her without meaning to. And I have always liked her no matter how much she has tried to ignore me or block me from her friend list or reply rudely to my texts. Because I don’t care, as long as she is, what she is to me – a precious ’special’ friend.
^_^


P.S: Yes I know that you can’t blush through text but sometimes, it just shows. *blush* *blush*