The text contained a complex jumble up of words and numbers. An IIT aspirant, from the nearby town of Kota was called in to solve the riddle. Adbhutiya Acharyanathan, drove a quick glance through the entire scroll before starting to scribble calculations in a rough sheet of paper. After an eager 7 minutes 23 seconds, he had it cracked. He said, “It wasn’t too hard. Some of the calculations were from the 1998 and 2001 paper. I have learnt it by heart, so it wasn’t a problem. But the rest of it is just Shakespeare style writing.” The manuscript, along with the boy’s interpretation, was sent to the A-M.A.N.I.A.C. (Archaeological Manuscripts Archives Needed In Apocalyptic Conditions) for safekeeping and further research. An old man representing the association, expressed his gratitude on being handed over this ancient treasure. He spoke about how he and Nostradamus used to share their lunch boxes in school, and how he had tried to stop him from running away to the caves when he had failed in written English.

After being rejected several times, finally, on 24^th Of March, the heavens blessed me the chance of a lifetime. My appointment request for a face-to-face interview with The Xeno was confirmed.

That morning, was probably the most important day of my life as I made my way through the large iron gates of The Xenoic Villa. I felt like an ant, walking through the cobbled-stone pathway littered with autumn leaves and patterned by the shadow of the sunlight glinting through the overhead arch formed by the branches of aspen trees flanking me. Soon enough, the trees and the garden made way to show me the most spectacular view of the mansion.

It was a dark night; definitely darker and more exciting than the one just after your marriage. There were only the two living souls in the otherwise empty room- A Computer, and a BSNL Modem Router.

There was love in the air as the two love bugs felt that uneasy closeness which made them blush. Even the mosquitoes hurried into their dark corners with popcorn buckets shouting,"Hurry up! The show is just about to start!"

And so it did.

The UPS charged itself up. The CPU started its romantic hum as the black screen of the monitor faded away to display a warm welcome. The Modem blinked in anticipation.

The saga of eternal peripheral love started. First the power button on the modem gleamed a bright yellow color. Then the ‘Status’ indicator flickered to life. And then finally the USB light sparkled in the dark room. It was a mystic love affair, far from the understanding of a human brain.

The earth shook, and the heavens fell apart. Light shone from amidst the deep black clouds upon the tired soldiers with their big fat chemistry books. And suddenly it started raining question papers. They fell from the sky and created a small whirlwind which threatened to turn into a ruthless hurricane. The soldiers dropped their chemistry books and ran for cover. Who could have thought, that the heavens would send upon them such a deadly weapon of mass destruction. This unprecedented catastrophe stole every tiny bit of courage, hope and sun-screen (SPF 60) that was left in the soldiers, and poisoned them with despondency.

There was complete panic at the Chief Strategic Headquarters of the W.H.A.C.K.O. (World Heavily Armed Commando to Kill Opposition). Only two men at the C.D/D.V.D (Central Decisive and Directorate of Vulnerable Decisions) knew that they would have to pass the penultimate verdict which would decide the fate of the universe in this war between heaven and earth. They knew that they would have to take the call. So with tears in their eyes, and cartons of red-bull on the stand-by, they decided to sort it out the intelligent fool-proof way.